Dogmometer

It's funny in our house with our pet dog, Trixie. We can usually determine what the weather is like outside by what she does when she comes inside. Anytime it's raining, snowing or just plain cold she comes in and runs around the house at greyhound speeds. This must help generate body heat or generate enough wind to dry her off, we aren't sure which. When it is hot outside and she comes in she will suddenly fall over as if fainting from a case of the vapors. It doesn't happen very often, because Utah doesn't get that hot ;-) but every once-in-awhile you will catch her flopping over on her side mid stride. A few days ago we had a freak snowstorm and I lovingly sent her out in the blizzard to do her business. She came the house at a full sprint and ran 3 or 4 laps around the living room. We decided that we should start documenting how long she runs when she comes in from the cold. We have a theory that if we tracked the duration of her sprints that we could determine the temperature, precipitation type, wind speed and possibly even the barometric pressure. I'll let you know how that turns out.

Going Green

It's no secret how I feel about the whole save the planet / go green thing. I think it's load of what was wafting through Lehi the other day. Everybody who is anybody seems to be jumping on the bandwagon, even major corporations are getting pressured into committing to clean up their act.

Mostly I think it's funny because if anybody really wanted to clean up the planet they would probably start at the places of the planet that are doing the most damage. Here in the good 'ole US of A we have the EPA (Environmental Protection Agency) that get paid to think about this stuff for us. Why do you think so many companies don't actually do their manufacturing here anymore? That and the constant need to build smaller and smaller iPods necessitates using smaller and smaller fingers to assemble them. We may draw the line at child labor, but that only applies to American children apparently.

I know it's twisted but I love to see companies, and people, who profess to be earth friendly do things that don't seem to backup up their claims. For instance, the other day I received a "bill" in the mail from Home Depot for my Home Depot Credit Card. When I opened the bill I found, to my amazement, that my current balance owed is $0.00, and that a minimum payment of $0.00 is due no later than April 21st of this year. There is also a warning that a late payment could cost me up to $35.00, which seems a bit excessive to me.

That's right, The Home Depot paid $0.43 to send me a letter to let me know that I owe them nothing and I better pay it right away or else. This 3 page statement thoughtfully includes a self-addressed envelope and a detachable portion to return with my payment. Also included on the 3 pages is a number for credit counseling, just in case I have gone overboard on lumber purchase lately, a list of my recent no purchases and a detailed description how APR is calculated.

I guess I better write them a check so I don't accrue any penalties or fees as a result.

Happy Groundhog Day

Ahhh yes, Groundhog day at last. That most special day of the year when all eyes turn to a groundhog to learn how much longer Winter will drag on. It is unclear how this rodent came to possess such powers of prognostication but it is difficult to argue with results.

It is an odd ritual to be sure. A large rodent pokes his chubby head out of his hole and in a moment determines the outcome of future of the world. Depending on the brightness of the sun at the exact moment he looks around his hole determines if Winter will end early or last another 6 months.

Of course everybody wants winter to end early this year. Not that I blame them, with all of the snow that global warming has brought this year. Why even as we speak half of the country is being purified by the cleansing purity of driven snow. But who drives the snow? Very small cowboys of course.

In case you were wondering the groundhog did NOT see his shadow today signifying an early end to winter. I think this is the first time I have ever heard of his not seeing his shadow. In the past he has been able to see his shadow even in complete darkness. It must be magic.

Thanks Phil

Pain in the Neck

So, I am in pretty severe pain right now. I really hurt my neck and the pain goes down into my shoulder. It's been a long time since I have hurt myself like this. The ironic thing is that I haven't done anything that one would normally expect would bring on such an injury. So what was I doing when I injured myself?...Sneezing.

Yeah, that's right, I sneezed and pulled a neck muscle. Go ahead, get it out of your system. I have been sneezing a ton lately because I have a stuffy nose. Whenever I use nasal spray so I can breathe it causes me to sneeze. I think I would almost rather not breathe at this point. Luckily it only hurts whenever I move my neck so as long as I don't move my head my neck and shoulder don't hurt.

I really can't believe that I hurt it so bad. I have been sneezing my whole life and I have never been immobilized due to it. I guess this has to be one of those signs that people talk about that indicate you are getting on in years.

This better not interfere with my rocking out in the car. I need that me time. I guess I should be worrying about how I'm going to sleep tonight. Well I guess I should get to it.

The long ride home

For some reason the ride home is always longer than the ride away from home. I think it has something to do with the thoughts that you are dwelling on during the trip. On the way there you are thinking of the fun you will have, who you will see and what fun things you have planned. On the way home the thoughts are not quite so appealing...going back to work and paying the bills just can't compare.

Of course the drive takes even longer if you are the only one that can drive. On the way down Wendi drove about half of the way and I was able to take a nap. It was nice, and the time flew by as a result. While on vacation we realized that her license had expired 4 months ago. Of course once we knew we couldn't unknow so the rest of the driving was left to me. This drive home was among the longest on record in my mind. I'm glad I took the extra day to recuperate.

Giving the family the crabs

Well, I am back home. Where have I been you ask? Well, we just got back from a week vacation to Arizona. I am from there and much of my family still lives there. This particular visit centered around my youngest cousin getting married. Let me just say, what a trip it was.


Lets just start with the weather. We left Utah's freezing temperatures and raced a storm front (on a flat) and were greeted by Arizona's weather in the 70-80's. Oh man it was nice to get a week break from the snow and ice. I did get to change a flat near beaver in shorts amid snow flurries and wind gusts up to 75 mph (the speed limit). I think I'm going to call that one "an experience". We arrived a bit later than we hoped, but we did arrive in once piece, so there is something to be said for that.

When we got there we found out that after 4 months of waiting the bank was finally ready to close on our refinance, the only problem was that we had to sign within the next three days. It's funny how when it's your time being wasted time is no concern, but the second the time being wasted is there suddenly you are expected to jump through hoops. Well I told them that they would have to find a way for us to sign while we were there in Arizona, and there was only 1 day that I would be available before the deadline. They ended up having a traveling notary come out to the house I was staying at to get the paperwork completed. I'll admit, it felt good to make them jump through some hoops for once.


The family was all there as I represented the Utah chapter of the clan. The temple ceremony was awesome like it always is. The sealer even let us take some pictures ;-) . Mental pictures were followed by more pictures which were then followed by still more pictures with a picture chaser. The sun was bright and I was squinting in all of mine I'm sure of it. The reception was held at an amazing home with the coolest pool I have ever seen in my life. It was built in to a raised portion and the whole side was glass so you could see in to the pool as water cascaded over the glass. Oh, and Wayne and some of his friends and family were there too :-)

After the wedding the bride and groom rushed off to California everybody tried to get back to normal life. We went and hung out with David, Emmy, Alexis and Timothy and had a blast. We went to the swap meet (Wendi's favorite) and to Sweet Tomatoes (a family tradition) and we killed some Nazi zombies. I also took the opportunity to try all of the different types of Cheerios known to man as they happened to have them all on hand. The fruit and chocolate flavored ones are among the best in case you were wondering. We also wifenapped Emmy to have some professional pictures taken. Finally, the night before we left, we went fish shopping. They had fish before but they were attacked by piranha and none survived. They bought a few for their aquarium and Wendi and I decided that we would buy them a fish or two to remember us by. We were thinking frogs, but Walmart had Crabs, and that just seemed right.

So in the end we gave David and his family crabs. Alexis was very excited to get crabs because this was the first time she had ever had crabs. She even named her crabs. We shared some laughs and towards the end some cries but all in all I'd say it was a vacation well spent.


Our dogs were VERY excited to see us. I think that they thought we were gone forever...again. They are so funny. I'll admit it feels pretty good to be greeted by people who have missed you wherever you go though.


The drive home took 11 hours, but no flats this time. And though the odds were stacked against me no tickets either. As fun as it was I look forward to a nice long sleep in my own bed on my own pillow in my own home.

Grading on a curve

Well...it's all over. All of the fanfare. All of the secrets. All of the paper and tags and bows. They all lead up to this one magical day. The day when we find out the results of our homework assignement for the past year to "be good". Come christmas morning the results of our homework are directly reflected in what the our test giver (Santa) has left under our tree.

I myself did not do as good as I have in years gone by, as I'm sure Wendi will attest. I partially blame UDOT for the last half of the year. It turns out I don't react well to long-term road construction...who knew?

Wouldn't it be nice if all aspects of our lives were graded in such a way? Nobody would ask eachother how they performed but rather wait for the gift(s) under the three to let them know. Paychecks from our jobs would reflect a different amount depending on how well one did thier job. Spousal arguments would be replaced with gifts of coal or macaroni sculptures of them getting the silent treatment.

Yep, if only Santa could be in charge of the good/bad thing all year round. Then we would see some change around here.